Anytime the UK decides to declassify military files, I hope they just hand them right to Guy Ritchie. The master of manly charming British men couldn’t be more equipped to make stories like The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. Ritchie can also double as superhero actor resurrection, taking men like Henry Cavill and legitimately turning them back into viable leading men without capes.
This story was a part of Winston Churchill’s (Rory Kinnear) declassified files in 2016. It takes place during the Blitz in 1941, when Britain was the lone holdout preventing Hitler from conquering Europe, and the US was hesitant to join the war effort due to German U Boat patrols in the Atlantic. British Intelligence ‘M’ (Cary Elwes) discovers that Germany’s supply of U Boat air filters is being stored in the Fernando Po Island off the Coast of Western Africa. England can’t directly interfere which would cause an international incident, so Churchill and M secretly send a renegade group of non gentlemen to get the job done, led by conman Gus March-Phillipps (Henry Cavill).
We’ve seen The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare before; this is basically The Dirty Dozen: UK edition. Ritchie hits the beats of a film like the master action conductor that he is. Our team gets a fun, comedy laden trial run breaking their genius military planner Geoffrey Appleyard (Alex Pettyfer) out of prison. During that siege, Gus, explosions master Freddy Alvarez (Henry Golding), Danish psycho Anders Lassen (Alan Ritchson), and ship navigator Henry Hayes (Hero Fiennes Tiffin) snipe with bows, rifles, and words, sauntering through the German military encampment and laying waste to a battalion of Nazis, stealing coats and audience hearts along the way. With the team set, they now devote their attention to the Fernando Po siege for U Boat carbon dioxide filters. Ritchie gives us a sun laden walkthrough of the beach, the key ships/players, and how they’re going to get those filters. Like all great heist films, there’s a plan of attack, and the plan encounters some setbacks. Being a bunch of conmen, these guys don’t panic when bad news comes their way, they usually put on a smirk, and their thinking caps, improvising a new plan that will also accomplish their mission. Cavill and Golding are Ritchie stalwarts at this point, having a blast playing a little bad and a little good, but 100% charming and badass. Alan Ritchson finds a fun niche here too, fusing his Blue Mountain State character with his Reacher character to create a cold unhinged maniac. The screenplay gives the men ample moments to snark while they’re battling, keeping the tone light and fun, a bit like a James Bond caper.
The wrinkle in The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is how the military is treated. In films with conmen doing war duties, the military usually come off as abrasive and stupid, chastising our heroes for their methods of war. Not so in this one: I would argue the most interesting characters are not on the Maid of Honor shipping boat holding our ungentlemen. Marjorie Stewart (Eiza Gonzalez) and Mr. Heron (Babs Olusanmokun) are special forces covert ops people, doing the real heavy lifting and maneuvering on Fernando Po. Heron laid the groundwork, discovering what’s on those German ships and building a laundering casino business to get the intel he needs, and Marjorie is sent into the viper’s nest, forced to woo the sadistic untrustworthy Nazi general Heinrich Luhr (Til Schweiger). The two of them also secure aid and support from the local muscle on the island, Prince Kambali Kalu (Henrique Zaga), who also has a score to settle with the Nazis and becomes instrumental to the mission’s success, and arguably has the most at stake. Kambali, Marjorie, and Heron’s mission forces them to really live double lives, which could blow up at any moment. Props to Guy Ritchie for not whitewashing this film with just the badass cons, and giving ample time for the island dweller trio’s missions, which give the movie most of its tension and suspense.
Despite being declassified in 2016, we all know how this larger tale ends. In this case, that knowledge keeps The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare light and fun, with all sorts of good vibes going on watching people be excellent at their jobs. So for Ben Affleck, Chris Evans, and any other hunky leading man struggling what to do after playing a superhero for a long time, maybe give Guy Ritchie a call? He’ll find a fun part for you, giving you the reset you need to get your acting career back up and running.