This is the most enthusiastic two star review I have given in a long time. Most movies in this realm are major disappointments. Iron Lung is not that. And, perhaps it indicates a future where YouTube stars can maybe become a movie star someday? It would be funny to see someone like Ninja or MrBeast getting a best actor nomination…to the abject horror of the cinephiles.
Iron Lung is based off a 2022 video game. We’re in a post apocalyptic wasteland; all planets and stars are mostly gone, and what little life remains is forced to scrounge for resources. Iron Lung is the name of a submarine that’s foraging through a planet that’s an ocean of blood (nice). It’s piloted by Simon (Mark Fischbach, or as fans know him, Markiplier on YouTube/Twitch), a convict welded into the worst prison sentence ever. His job as dictated by commander Ava (Caroline Rose Kaplan) above, is to navigate the depths of the blood ocean, searching for any resources. Me suspects there might be some down there, and that they might be alive too.
The jump from Internet celebrity to movie auteur (Markiplier wrote, directed, and starred in this baby) isn’t exactly well trodden territory. The deck was stacked against Fischbach. Practically, I get why he chose this video game to adapt for cost savings. But writing for a silent protagonist when you’re also directing and starring is a lot to ask. The writing is Iron Lung’s weakpoint, resorting to lots of prolonged silent passages that don’t work, and hyper annoyingly manipulative blurring of reality and mirage to when the story hits a stopping point, instead of spending just a little more time explaining the goals and logic of what Simon is trying to do in the blood sea.
And yet, I couldn’t help but be drawn in. Markiplier the actor doesn’t have a lot of performance cards to play; expect one of three things: silent brooding, quiet steely talking to himself, or guttural bellowing in frustration. But for those like me who’ve watched his videos over the years, he has that special something that makes him at the right moments pretty captivating to watch. And props for throwing yourself around that sub like a champ. But it’s Mark Fischbach, director, that really shines. Iron Lung’s best trait is the creepy atmosphere it generates with its practical setup. Like all sub movies, the Iron Lung is inherently claustrophobic, even moreso here as there’s very little places to hide in a welded 1 person sub. The moist, damp, kinda water kinda blood dripping is unnerving as all hell. As well as that darn camera, taking radioactive screenshots every couple seconds with unsettling imagery on them. And when Fischbach has to go big, he really makes this thing exciting and gross, making me feel like the issues were more monetary than creative, a gold star as far as I’m concerned.
So here’s to you Markiplier. The path from YouTube celebrity to movie star has officially been created. I look forward to some of the disasters that will result from this (Smosh the movie, anyone?). But maybe moreseo, I would like to see if Markiplier gives this whole movie thing a go. He’s got something, and with a little more money, I want to see what he’s capable of!