Ishtar is more famous in Hollywood for what happened outside the screen then what happens on it. It’s one of Hollywood’s most famous flops, as it went crazy overbudget, causing the studio to fight with the director (Elaine May) and the two stars (Dustin Hoffman and Warren Beatty) in public, which buzzed the movie into the ground. But is the movie itself as bad as it is remembered in Hollywood? The answer is…mostly yes, unfortunately. I don’t think I laughed once at this film. Good news if you’re making a drama…except Ishtar is a comedy.
Chuck (Hoffman) and Lyle (Beatty) are struggling aspiring songwriters in New York City. However sweet their ambitions start, they fall apart quickly, as they both suck at it and their significant others abandon them and their dream. Desperate, their agent Marty (Jack Weston) books them on a tour in the Middle East, playing clubs in Morocco. On their way, the pair run into Shirra (Isabelle Adjani), a revolutionary in the neighboring country Ishtar. Chuck is also approached by Jim Harrison (Charles Grodin), who works for the CIA, against Shirra’s rebellion. The doofusy Chuck and Lyle then get drawn into this proxy war, unknowingly playing key roles in the conflict.
Ishtar suffers with what I’ve been calling Mamma Mia! syndrome, though this movie made me consider renaming it. The events and situations here are funny to the filmmakers, but they are not funny to anyone else. It was probably hilarious that Warren Beatty cast himself as the awkward Lyle, who couldn’t flirt with any women because, I mean, look at him! He’s Warren Beatty! The first half of the film is Hoffman and Beatty doing really bad nightclub acts/jingles. Writing bad songs sounds funny in your head, but execution matters, and the bad songs are just lazy, not well thought out.
And that’s the bigger sin here, is what Elaine May chose to focus on instead of the script. Idiots that become embroiled in a crime saga can totally work if executed well: just look at Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels a few years later. However,May clearly used that budget on stage dressing and location shoots. Grant it, Morocco especially looks awesome, and the desert battle sequence also looks pretty amazing, as well as the costumes. But May ingnores the glaring problems with the script. And it’s not just the Mamma Mia! syndrome above. There’s all sorts of unfunny attempts to provide fish out of water sequences, usually making the foreigners the butt of the joke instead of Hoffman/Beatty which comes off borderline racist. Movies that make everyone act stupidly also rub me the wrong way: why can’t the CIA do a background check on these two American idiots and realize they’re dipshits? Why would everyone act this crazy over a map? All of these little problems build and build, culminating in the CIA, covert operating organization extraordinaire, engaging in public helicopter battles, and unable to weasel out of a deal negotiated by a bunch of idiots. Ishtar is the movie version of a mediocre meal that leaves a horrible aftertaste and acid reflux, bothering you more as you spend time away from it.
At least Elaine May, Warren Beatty, and Dustin Hoffman got dem checks. And I’ll say this, movies like Ishtar made everyone realize that movie studios maybe had a little too much power, leading to the great independent film movement of the 1990s. Should we really be thanking Ishtar then? Let me think about it for two seconds: no way Jose! Damn it Ishtar, now you’re making me use culturally insensitive expressions. That’s what I get for letting a blind camel lead me through the desert…