For the Gen Zers, I can’t possibly explain how exciting 2004’s Mean Girls was. It seemed that until that point high school stories were filtered through only men, and Tina Fey’s script remains as sharp, biting, and culturally relevant as when it burst onto the scene 20 years ago. Now a generation removed, Fey tries to capture the magic again by giving her story a musical job and a script lift. But movie cosmetic surgery means Mean Girls sadly has become a pale imitation of it’s trailblazing self. I wish I could bake a movie cake of rainbows and smiles: I have a lot of feelings.
Here’s the bullet points for everyone not a millennial: Cady Heron (Angourie Rice) was a girl home schooled by her mother (Jenna Fischer) in Africa. For her junior year, mom gets a job at Northwestern University, sending Cady to high school for the first time. It’s hard sledding at first, but Cady eventually makes friends with artsy Janis Ian (Auli’i Cravalho) and Damian (Jaquel Spivey), and develops a crush on a boy in her AP Calc class, Aaron Samuels (Christopher Briney). Shockingly, Cady’s deemed pretty enough to be invited into the “plastics”: good looking women at the top of North Shore High School’s social hierarchy. That trio includes busybody motormouth Gretchen Wieners (Bebe Wood), affable airhead Karen Shetty (Avantika), and the queen bee of North Shore, Regina George (Renee Rapp), who happens to also be Aaron’s ex boyfriend.
This was a lose lose situation for Tina Fey; she knows better, and should’ve just made a cameo. The biggest mistake she makes with this script is straight up repeating the punch lines or famous scenes of the 2004 movie. So what we see are reenactments of “So you agree? You’re very pretty.” “Whatever I’m getting cheese fries.” “You go Glen Coco” etc. The 2004 movie is near perfect, so watching this 2024 try to recreate perfection? It’s an impossible task Fey has written for her young cast to deliver. I found myself repeatedly thinking: “That’s not as funny as the first one,” and my theater mostly agreed, since a lot of those moments played to complete silence. The movie works at least a little better when it’s singing or when some new dialogue shows up, with Karen, Janice, and especially Regina getting the big musical numbers. In the end, a 50 something Fey trying to write trailblazing material for teenagers based on a 20 year old story? I should’ve expected less.
The casting goes a long way to making the movie at least a little palatable. The biggest applause goes to Renee Rapp, who played Regina George on Broadway, and does enough of a good job here to get at least not embarrass herself in Rachel McAdams’s size 6 shadow. No one outshines their 2004 counterpart, but biggest props goes to Avantika, who at least equal’s Amanda Seyfried’s Karen (it helps that she gets all the best lines) and Busy Phillips, who achieves Amy Poehler’s cool mom with worse lines. Auli’i Cravalho, Bebe Wood, and Jaquel Spivey are also perfectly solid, especially Moana herself, Cravalho, who shows off the best musical chops and gets a banger of a highlight reel. The big let downs are Angourie Rice and Christopher Briney: who have none of the amazing energy and charisma of Lindsey Lohan or Jonathan Bennett: big problem since they’re kind of the main plot drivers of the movie.
Even with the musical parts, Mean Girls feels like a Disney direct to DVD sequel that’s trying to get the lovers of the 2004 original to bring their kids to the movies to watch this one. Big tip for mom & dad: you might want to instead do a double movie night with your kid, and have a teen movie off. You bring 2004’s Mean Girls, and they can bring 2023’s Bottoms, the real Mean Girls successor that feels as daring and exciting as the movie you loved. And then you can go see this one, and laugh at how stupid it is together. Ok, now that is so fetch!