Movie Review: Annie

Annie is a beloved musical with timeless songs. 2014 Annie wants to be a modern remake of a classic but will just end up a sing-a-long. This poorly scripted remake does nothing to amplify the songs and ruthlessly pulls on your heartstrings to the point of eyerolling. And you dragged Quevenzhane Wallis into this. HOW DARE YOU.

This Annie (Wallis) is a foster child (NOT ORPHAN) in New York City under the watch of the irritating Ms. Hannigan (Cameron Diaz). While waiting for her parents to show up, Annie crosses paths with Mayoral hopeful Will Stacks (Jamie Foxx). Stacks’s campaign manager (Bobby Canavale) realizes that a “relationship” between the two will boost the cell phone millionaire’s poll numbers. So Stacks, with the help of trusty assistant Grace (Rose Byrne), let Annie move in with her during the campaign. Real feelings develop. Songs are sung. Parents show up. Hopefully not a dry eye in the theater results.

The songs, which should be Annie’s big selling point, are woefully mixed in success. Rest easy fans: Tomorrow is easily the film’s high point, and will leave you as euphoric as it should. Annie’s big solo at an event gives the movie a nice Awww moment as well. Hard Knock Life is fine, but needs modernizing. Other than that, the rest of the songs have some sort of flaw that holds them back. 2014 version of Easy Street comes out of nowhere and doesn’t make sense for the film we were watching. The biggest problem is the herculean effort needed to mask weaker singers. Wallis’s lack of range is fine; it sorts of adds an earnestness to the character (I cringed at obvious sound editing to her voice). However, dubbing her or combining her voice with Jamie Foxx’s is a great way to make her sound crappy. Cameron Diaz is even worse: she’s openly admitted she cannot sing, and she has multiple numbers where she also has to combine voices with Foxx (who has a STELLAR voice). All the editing gives the weaker voices a manufactured feel; had director Will Gluck used the voice weakness to symbolize the issues with the characters, the script would contain more emotion and depth.

That is assuming the script had any thought put into it whatsoever. The best idea 2014 Annie has is using social media for major plot points, letting her reputation grow via Twitter and the press. However, political campaigning on image vs. issues is brought up and never discussed again; no one follows up on Stacks’s involvement in Annie’s “parents;” and worst of all, characters 180 their development for plot service. Ms. Hannigan and Stacks’s campaign manager are the biggest culprits, although Grace has her moments as well.

Quevenzhane Wallis was mesmerizing in Beast of the Southern Wild at age 6. Here, she is neutered into a one note character of enthusiasm, which Wallis easily nails. There are brief moments where Annie gets some shades that Wallis acts the hell out of; it is a shame the movie doesn’t trust her skills more. Jamie Foxx is cute and fine as Stacks, his best moments coming with Wallis or when using his amazing voice. Bobby Canavale is requisitely sleazy as the campaign manager. Rose Byrne is underused; she is amusing when covering up her lack of friends, and I wish the movie used that more. Cameron Diaz is woefully miscast and poorly written. She way overacts and fails to sell the necessary evolution of her character.

Annie is harmless but thoughtless entertainment. Hoping to capture families with kids on winter break, this remake fails to identify the magic of the original and make it applicable for the kids of today outside of excessive use of social media. At least it teaches a new generation that New York City is the place of dreams: dreams of obtaining as many material possessions as possible. Sigh.

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