Congratulations for leaving school kids! June has some real hot garbage to serve you this year, save Miami, child drivers, and especially California, who knows how to party…
WONDER WOMAN
The Good: Gal Gadot is intriguing as the lead, and Chris Pine has been stellar since Into the Woods.
The Bad: 4 awful words: “story by Zack Snyder”
Prediction:
The past setting should help, but DC inspires no one with their hot garbage from 2016.
CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS: THE FIRST EPIC MOVIE
The Good: A really cool kids story with the writer of the Muppets, Nicholas Stoller, who has many more hits than misses on his resume.
The Bad: Dreamworks Animation mostly just caters to children.
Prediction:
The ceiling is high for this one, but Dreamworks has left me disappointed a lot.
THE MUMMY
The Good: Tom Cruise lights up the screen whenever he’s on it.
The Bad: If you look at the names of the characters, this smells like a franchise establishing property, plus the writers/directors are bipolar.
Prediction:
Cruise will give it his all, but this property is beneath him.
IT COMES AT NIGHT
The Good: OMG, A24 is so hot right now, and the trailer alone will scare the hell out of you.
The Bad: A summer horror release is perplexing.
Prediction:
Trust the behind the scenes creatives; this one will deliver the scare goods.
CARS 3
The Good: This is the best storyline of the Cars Franchise.
The Bad: The story was told to perfection by Toy Story 3, plus Pixar has made one great movie in the last few years.
Prediction:
It will look beautiful, but Pixar needs merchandising I guess. How the mighty have fallen.
ALL EYEZ ON ME
The Good: One of the greatest stories of the past 30 years that has not been on the big screen yet: the life of Tupac Shakur.
The Bad: The entire creative team is either untested or music directors, plus the guy who really wanted to make this story left the project due to creative differences.
Prediction:
Music video directors still revere Shakur, I am hoping with this star rating a little, but the story is so good that I imagine that will cover up any flaws.
ROUGH NIGHT
The Good: The writers/directors and a star of the funniest comedy of the last 5 years are at the helm, with Scarlett Johansson!
The Bad: Can the 30 minute TV format translate into a movie length feature? Plus, the story isn’t exactly super inspired.
Prediction:
You’ll laugh a lot, that I can be sure of, and what more do you want in a comedy?
TRANSFORMERS: THE LAST KNIGHT
The Good: A movie theater has air conditioning, giving people without it between 3 and 8 hours of time cooling off.
The Bad: Michael Bay’s misogyny and tone-deaf racism not enough for you? Great, we’ve added a story from the Batman & Robin and Divergent series, cause those are great films.
Prediction:
Also if you’re sleep deprived, bring earplugs, and take a nice nap.
THE BIG SICK
The Good: A perceptive writer and star Kumail Nanjiani with a contemporary story, plus the buzz out of the festivals is really strong.
The Bad: Can Nanjiani carry a movie as a lead?
Prediction:
This thing should have a lot to say about interracial dating in the modern world by a smart pair of writers who’ve worked together for a while.
THE BEGUILED
The Good: The cast is excellent, and I want to see how Sofia Coppola handles period details.
The Bad: Coppola hasn’t directed a great movie in a long time, and this sounds like the plot of the Virgin Suicides, just during the Civil War.
Prediction:
I’m interested, mostly because the cast can elevate Coppola’s material to something really interesting.
DESPICABLE ME 3
The Good: The first Despicable Me was very cute.
The Bad: The 2nd wasn’t and the story gets even lamer (Gru has a TWIN BROTHER? WHAAAAA?????)
Prediction:
I’m in for the minions, that’s it.
BABY DRIVER
The Good: Edgar Wright has made my top 10 list before, and everything he does is at least interesting.
The Bad: Can the driving stunts come close to a Fast and Furious movie? The bar is real high.
Prediction:
Wright’s original movies are all pretty special; I trust he’ll come up with something stupendous.
THE HOUSE
The Good: Neighbors and Neighbors 2 were fun, if not super revolutionary (this movie shares the same writer with Neighbors).
The Bad: Sadly, most comedians have a shelf life, and time has passed Will Ferrell and Amy Poehler, barring some unforeseen transformation.
Prediction:
Ferrell tickles my funny bone, but even I have to admit his best adventures are behind him.